Keegan watching the Steeler game with me

Trying to make him a Steeler fan.

Making Space with Lego

Download now or watch on posterous

VID_20110106_190751.3gp (19382 KB)

Remmy

Remmy

A Post on Things I Find Hard to Blog About

This little discussion has come about from a few youth group conversations and some recent conversations with family members. Earlier this year, with the church split, I was basically in a meltdown mode. I was emotionally all over the place. My dad suggested that I blog about it. I did, kind of. However, I knew that if I did there might be people hurt, confused, or mad with what I have wrote. So for the detailed stuff, I went to my Evernote account. Evernote is a note taking service. I can write notes and stuff and keep it behind a password. This has helped me get through some of the more difficult days as of late, without putting strange, depressing status message on FB and Twitter, or post that would hurt on my blog. I struggle with the balance of speaking truth in love. I love all of my friends and family. I would love some to be able to read some of these posts, but they would have to be put in context on what I was feeling and why I felt that way when I wrote it. Not that there is anything mean or nasty, but I have said things, when I was younger, that was meant to be positive, only for it to come across poorly and what was received was less than being loved by me. So I resort to having to put these things behind a password. The only exception is my wife, well my parents too. We usually talk about everything.

However, (now the real post is beginning) that isn’t what God meant for us. The original idea was that we were to be transparent with God and with each other. This is illustrated, by the fact that in Genesis 2:25 where it is said that they were naked and felt no shame. Isn’t that what we strive for? Being naked, well, in this case in metaphorical terms of being transparent, and having no shame. Obviously, there was nothing that came between Adam and Eve. They may have been physically naked and not had any shame, but I’m of the opinion that they could talk to each other and to God for that matter without holding anything back, and still feel no shame.

It is when “the fall” occurs that the transparency is gone. In Genesis 3:6-11, as God was walking through the garden, they hid because they were naked. Because they had done the wrong thing (eating of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil), in this case they became aware of the fact that they had disobeyed God. So they try to sew fig leaves together to cover themselves. This is pretty typical. Do the wrong thing, and cover it up when you realize that it was the wrong thing, and don’t tell the ones you love that you messed up, or even blame them.

Ever since, we have constantly had a disconnection from God…and from each other. I think it is important to point out that when the fall of man occurred, that there wasn’t just a separation from God, but in our personal relationships. Even the best relationships still hold back information afraid or ashamed to admit something from our past. However, through Jesus Christ, he comes to bridge that separation with God, and each other. Imagine that we did nothing for selfish gain, but in a true Spirit of love. Even if we did mess up, even if it was something that was considered major, and in most people’s eyes you were considered bad, that family, friends, and the community would rally around you and not excuse the sin, but help to restore you to wholeness. This is possible with Jesus Christ, through the Holy Spirit.

“But you don’t understand…,”How many times have I heard that? In 10+ years of youth ministry, I’ve heard that so many times, and it couldn’t be further from the truth. God has put people in your path, that are full of the Holy Spirit to guide and direct you! So you may not have experienced the same thing, but pain is pain. In my post about how I was leaving Facebook for a while, I shared that it was as painful as two break ups with girls I dated. One of which, was a girl that I lost my virginity to. The pain from each break up and the church split were on par with each other. Soul ties were made, in some case from physical intimacy, and in the other from close friendships that are for now not necessarily lost, but at least awkward because of the fall out from the split. In the case of the girls, I wandered around disconnected from most people and ashamed of what had happened. In the case of the church split, I am healing well, as friends, family, and community, not caring what side of the line I stood on, have rallied around me in the spirit of love, and restored me, well at least some of them. So remember, find someone you trust, to be transparent with, and follow James 5:16. To confess your sins to another and God, will set you free. It did me, so many years ago.

While I am more transparent with people now than I was 10, 15, 20 years ago, I still have more to do. However, what holds me back, are the ones who are not as spiritually mature and would have a hard time being transparent themselves. So I continue to work on the way that I love people, being as transparent as possible. I pray that they are with me. That way one day, I can post things that I find hard to blog about, currently.

Josh’s concert

Karlie's funny face is hilarious!

The finished product

Our tree this year.

Remmy again

My phone camera wouldn't focus when the Stefanic boys were here. 🙁

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

There’s a lot to be thankful for. Watch this and think about what you complain about and what you should do to change your attitude.

Despite problems from time to time, I’m thankful for all of my family, that I have a job, and …it’s too numerous to count.

God wants so much for us if we let Him work through others for us

I hope that no one will read into this post too much. I was writing in my journal this afternoon, and began riffing on something that I has been rolling around in my head for a while. In the midst of the writing was this paragraph which I felt needed to be shared.

I had a flashback to when I was a sophomore at GVSU. I was talking to my roommate who had surgery on his knee. I was trying to empathize or sympathize, with him (I get those two confused). I had had reconstructive surgery on my nose (interior) while in high school and the pain and uncomfortable feeling was bad. He kept telling me it wasn’t the same as what he went through with his knee, but wasn’t it? What it came down to, was that the causes and parts of the bodies were different, but pain and uncomfortable feelings with post-surgery were the same. It is possible that the intensity was different, but again does that matter? I guess what I’m getting at is that despite the cause of the sadness or heartbreak, everybody hurts and we can all share our stories and pain with each other. That’s what God want us to do, right? Where two or more are gathered in His name, there he is? If we share with each other, then we are sharing with Him? I know that in the church today, we would rather not hear people’s tales of woe, and pride prevents us from sharing. No wonder so many teens leave the church and unplug. No one wants to share their pain or share another’s pain. That’s what I am frustrated with.

This isn’t completely finished. It was just a riff that I felt that needed to be shared. I think that if we shared more deeply, that healing would be more a part of the church, than we see today. I have felt that there is one last great revival, I’m not talking about tents and evangelists or healing ceremonies, I’m talking about like the Great Awakening, The Reformation, you know a time when people don’t get enough of God and change happens. Not this faux political change from the Republicans or Democrats, but change that people would love one another. Okay, now go back to your surfing.

More Car Problems

Just as we get a handle on the tire situation, this morning, the car decided to spring a leak in its radiator. We actually got a surprise bit of money the other day, besides the money for the tires so we may be good with this. It does set us back a bit for Christmas, but that's not why we celebrate it. Good thing also that I have off the next several days. We have some time to get this fixed before we have to creatively figure how to get Karlie to school and Mary and I to work.