I do want to address the rumor that I favored one side over another. Nothing could have been further from the truth. I want to say this, I am, besides a very deeply spiritual Christian, I am also a researcher. Once past my emotional responses, I look very closely at all the independent data possible to make a decision. In this case, I prayed fervently, talked to independent people, and looked over evidence. I didn’t just get the information from one side. Not to mention having served on previous churches boards that, incidentally, dealt with complaints from the congregation about the staff or the pastor, I made my decision. It was a painful decision to make, but I couldn’t go along with what had happened.

I am, or at least I thought, very good friends with people who stayed at GCC, so when I left Gaylord Community Church for Life Church, I was shocked to hear that I left because I was in the “Scheer clique.” Obviously, those people don’t know me as well as I thought, and to hear these things was very hurtful. I follow Christ, and not any particular pastor. I made this decision out of prayerful contemplation, scripture, reason, and experience. The Wesleyan quadrilateral of defining your faith.

Anyway, things, on a personal level have spun out of control for me. I get mad about the rumors between the churches, and about me. Also I have lost at least one friend on Facebook because of this split. In fact, I told Mary and another friend of mine that I haven’t felt this heartbroken with this decision, since my first girlfriend in college broke up with me, and since I don’t intend to revisit that time again. I am leaving Facebook stay out of the dueling “yea! I love my church” status messages.

I had also considered leaving Life Church briefly, for a local UM Church, i.e. the Boyne area, where I know the pastor as well. However, leaving Facebook will have to suffice for now. If some of the family strain gets too much, I may still go there, but for now, I will attend Life Church, and because I disagree with the decision and process that went into that decision, I can’t go back to GCC in good conscience.

I will always be friends with those who have opted to stay and I love each one of them. It will be awkward to meet at times, but that will fade. I will not harbor any resentment. That would be unGodly.

So until the smoke clears…

Caritas,

Jeff Lutz

This was cross posted from my Facebook notes.

The first major change in a long time has finally happened, the old house sold. Mary and I signed the papers on Friday (8/6/10) declaring the house is no longer ours. We now just own one house, the one in Boyne Falls. I praise God for that.  With that bit of news, there are some negative things that have been happening, as well. I won’t list them here, they are related, and they have been rather heart breaking, in the figurative sense of the word, but change is happening.

It has been a while since I shared about my spirituality.  The short version is that I “sense” more than I used to, and reading the Bible has become more revelatory than I used to know.  In this case, despite a few of the negatives that have shown up, I got the impression that Jeremiah 30:17 is in play, but only if people will do what Matthew 5:23-24 says. I’m struggling with this, because I feel the need to go to some of the heart breakers and talk to them, because they did hurt me. So, I have been praying.  Now, I’m not sure when an answer to this prayer will come, but I heard three pastors a few months ago, that I think God was speaking through, to me, in preparation for this moment.

1. Rob Bell preaching about a Sacred Waste
2. Brian Zahnd preaching about Salt and Light
3. Duane Van Der Klok preaching about Mega Faith

I know that I will have to pour out an offering in figurative terms. That I will have serve those I pray for.
That I will not see an answer right away, even though it looks like nothing will ever happen.

In my RSS reader were these posts from some bloggers that I read. The first was from Don Miller, the author of Blue Like Jazz. His post about Let Story Guide You had this excerpt that was rather reminiscent of events here, as of late.

The other problem with real life is it’s hard to tell whether or not you are the bad guy. We all believe we are the good guy or that our words and actions are justified. The other day I lost my temper at a stranger. I really let them have it. I still feel like they deserved it. It was a bully situation in which somebody was being threatened. But I went too far, honestly. I pretty much said things that person will be thinking about for years. I went for the jugular and put him in his place. Or perhaps it went in one ear and out the other, I don’t know. But regardless, I was thinking about that today, and realized that the things I said could be placed word for word into a film in which the character that said it got “what they deserved” at the end and nobody would really care. Stink. Can’t believe I said those things.

I worry about my temper at times when I need to confront things, because I don’t want to end up in this situation. Besides, when I do get angry in an argument, I can’t think clearly enough to make sense. So to combat this I pray. Of course, the book study that I happen to be reading online from theologian Scot McKnight is Psalms. The post that I read about has been Psalms 25:17-22. Here’s his commentary:

The psalmist’s inner heart is in need of relief (v. 17); the psalmist is in trouble and wants forgiveness (v. 18); the psalmist then thinks of his enemies and wants deliverance (v. 19). So he prays for deliverance (20-21).

And then suddenly, the psalmist moves to the People of God: redeem Israel (v. 22).

Read more here.

So the Psalmist is praying just the way I have been feeling, and for the resolution that I believe that we are looking for. That is my prayer tonight…Lord, give strength to reconcile without the anger, heal my broken heart, heal your church, and give me rest. Amen.

My rest is the only thing I can control. That is the one thing I will work on is resting. For these changes have been exhausting.

I have been tempering that as of late. I’m trying to moderate my initial enthusiasm for a program or speaker so that I can say how could this help improve what we are doing, and not this is the new way.

Josh Griffin who’s the High School Ministry pastor at Saddleback church pointed to a video about missional churches. The the link to Tony Morgan’s blog about either/or thinking, when we should probably be both/and thinking. Either/or thinking, when it comes to church, usually leads to somebody else is doing it wrong. He gives this as the reason:

The problem, of course, is that we like to worship our methods. Our preferences are the priority. In fact, we shape religion around our preferences even if it means sacrificing the broader impact of our ministry. Why help other people when it might make us uncomfortable?

via “And” Instead of “Or” | TonyMorganLive.com.

That has been my experience in my own life as well as churches that I have attended. We try to worship our methods at worshipping God rather than God himself. Kind of like what Paul says in Romans 1:25.

Embracing the both/and way of doing things, both ways of worship/discipleship/evangelism/mission will work in the context of the culture that they are immersed in. In that way, we all do church together.

Remmy started things off with the pondering, did she take her first breath? or did she say the name of God?

Next, I threw a polemic out on Facebook chastising all of us, for feel good (lead by Hollywood) giving to Haiti. I had to explain to a young friend of mine that I wasn’t saying we shouldn’t be giving to help Haiti, but we do a terrible job at helping the poor of this country, and other countries. We can afford it. As I recently was reminded that 8% of the world owns a car. That the amount of ice cream sales in America for a year, we could drill wells and provide clean drinking water to everyone on the planet.

Don’t ask God to feed the hungry when you have plenty of food. We are saved to do good works, not do good works to be saved.

My thoughts then drifted to the vehicle situation, when at times I feel like the psalmist laments in Psalms 13:1-2 and realize that God owns it all. He will prevail, and I will remain open to how He is working in the world.

Things are stirring in my life, I’m not sure how this pans out, but it does seem that good things will happen.

Here’s to you remaining open to how God is working in this world, and that you keep saying His name, even if you don’t believe in Him.

The Youth Ministry Gap#comment-7084.

Henry Neufeld, a United Methodist blogger, makes the point that I have been feeling for a long time.

While we’re worried about losing the external trappings of Christmas, such as public trees and manger displays, the real war on Christmas is practically won already. Christmas has almost nothing at all to do with Jesus. This has been my opinion for many years. Christmas as celebrated in America, even in most of our churches, is about us and our economic prosperity, not about Jesus and his good news.

This is something that needs to be taken out of the church. It is hard to extract, but I think that if we extract this consumeristic view of Christmas, we may just get a revival in this land. I think that some of this is happening. It will be a slow process.

Read his whole post.

The Real War on Christmas « Threads from Henry’s Web.

Left with Questions.

HOW INTERNET PORN IS CHANGING TEEN SEX: DETAILS Article on men.style.com.

Why Church? – Real World Parents.